New Years Resolutions
A rather frank discussion follows:
With the year coming to an end soon, I have been putting some thought into how I would like to make 2011 better than ever. I am talking about New Years Resolutions.
I feel like an old lady saying this, but I am really super-excited about the possibility of getting a masticating juicer machine. I am hoping that I can use the juicer to squeeze out vital nutrients that my severely shortened bowels will be able to use and allow me to start feeling healthier.
My health sucks. Really, it does. Ever since my emergency surgery where they removed a few feet of small bowels (I do not have a large intestine either), I swear that my energy levels plummeted and never came back up again. I mean, right after my previous j-pouch surgery I moved north and started school. I was able to walk a few miles easily and still have plenty of energy at the end of the day. I felt great, had stamina, and although I lost weight during that time, I still at least felt somewhat healthy.
Then I had the emergency surgery. My weight dropped to starving POW’s levels, and my energy levels just never returned. What the heck? At this point, 3 years later, I am finally ready to face reality head on and quit making excuses. Something about being in my late 20’s and not having the energy to do more than one or two activities a day just isn’t acceptable anymore. I’m tired of waking up each day not knowing if I am going to have a good-energy day or a bad one. The fact that I never sleep all night isn’t helping, but I just don’t think it should still be affecting me this much. I usually have to wake up every 1-3 hours to empty the pouch, the same goes for during the day. I hate not being able to go anywhere without having to determine where the bathrooms are and plan my trips around it. Traveling long distances is a pain in the butt, literally.
I also have very little reserve. It is impossible for me to eat according to the 3-square meals a day standard. Just trust me on that one. So when I get hungry, I have to eat RIGHT THEN or I will feel like I am going to pass out. As soon as I eat, I have to constantly head to the restroom, which means that I pretty much have to end the outing and head home. It’s annoying, and its time to finally at least try to do something more about it. I’m just so unbelievably tired of dealing with it all.
My answer? My answer, or at least part of it, is a a masticating juicer machine. It grinds fruits and veggies to a pulp while squeezing out the nutrient-rich juices. I am hoping that if I am diligent about juicing, that I will notice an improvement in my overall energy levels. My thinking is that my shortened bowels are just not able to digest and absorb everything in the short time that it has the food in it. Or something like that. With a toddler running around, I NEED to feel more energy soon. Very soon.
As a side note, I know that these are some of the best years of my life. Really. A body like mine, or any body, doesn’t get better with age. Maybe different, but things are designed to deteriorate, or rather it deteriorates by design, (thank you telomeres!). I am saying this because it spells the end of my days of just waiting for life to return back to normal, whatever normal is. I absolutely do not feel sorry for myself, because there are much worse lots in life and in that respect I am very, very lucky that my life is a full and rich as it is.
I am no longer going to wait anymore. Instead, I am going to embrace this wonderful life that I am fortunate to be sharing with 2 very special people, my husband and son, and the 2 dogs and 2 cats that fill our home with so much love and joy. There is not a day that goes by that I do not take a moment to count my blessings. The laughter and joys in my life far outshine any dark corners that I may have. So, for this New Years Resolution, I am use the juicer to help improve my diet, which in turn should help me have more energy. With this newly found energy, I am going to use it to live my life as full and rich as I can.