A Sibling for Nathan
No…don’t freak out, I am not preggo thanks to itsy-bitsy nauseating anti-baby pills (birth control). We would really like to have another little one, and soon. However, I am really anxious about the whole pregnancy thing. I really hate being pregnant in the beginning and spend every day of the first 16 weeks tethered to the toilet and wondering what in the world I gotten myself in to. Another GI issue rears its ugly head during early pregnancy thanks to a growing uterus putting pressure on my pouch. The combination of pressure on the j-pouch and pregnancy hormones causes me to have chronic, extreme diarrhea (sorry, TMI- just wanted to warn fellow j-pouchers about this perk of pregnancy). This is worse at night, meaning that sleep is impossible and if I make the mistake of sleeping for more than an hour, then I wake up to incontinence. It is positively awful. I find myself feeling like I am dying instead of growing new life.
The vomiting corrodes my esophagus. Have you ever had the experience of vomiting blood, and lots of it? It’s a lot of fun, let me tell you. Needless to say, I am nervous about the whole pregnancy thing. Then I look at Nathan and how much I love him, and I know I will have the same love for baby number 2. Plus, this time around I have a little experience under my belt. I know this time to request at-home intravenous fluids via a PICC line for dehydration early on to see me through those early weeks. I know now how to deal better with the GI issues. I have tons of tricks to get nutrition into my body for the baby despite hyperemesis. This time around, each day I have Nathan to remind me that there is a wonderful, miraculous light at the end of the really long tunnel.
I start feeling a tad bit better right around the time that my bump makes an appearance and I feel those first miraculous little kicks inside my womb. After that, my protective motherly instincts kick in and all the vomiting in the world can’t corrode the love and happiness I feel inside for this new little life I am growing.I positively LOVE being pregnant from week 18 until week 36. During this time, I have more good days than bad and I LOVE feeling my beloved little one moving around inside. It is the most wonderful, amazing experience.
I guess it is normal to feel nervous the second time around. I know that I will handle it just fine. There is no doubt in my mind about wanting another baby and pregnancy, I just wish it weren’t so hard on me. Who knows? Maybe it will be easier this time around since I know what to expect and how to address it. I get so excited wondering what the second one will look like, and if it will be a girl or a boy. I know Nathan will love being a big brother. He loves seeing other babies already. Anyhow…shall keep everyone updated on the baby topics. 🙂